Nowadays I diligently go through my spam mails before deleting them. There is a world of entertainment hidden there. Here are the top 5:
1) Very common are the ones with the plight of a terminally ill child who is paid 12 cents by the service provider for every person you forward the mail to.
2) Congrutaltions! You have 2.75 million dollars jackpot in the Online Lotto draw! Just open an account with us with a minimum deposit and we will transfer the winnings to you.
3) This one i got today. Its great news! Some solicitor has traced my name as the sole beneficiary of an estate worth 5.3 million dollars belonging to a man who has died hierless and without a will. This diligent bugger has traced me based on my last name and is willing to file a claim for me in return of 40% of the amount.
4) Natasha is looking for you! Along with 2347789 beautiful females!! Only at bharatmatrimonials.com
5) But the winner is Penis Enlargement Pills. Herbal, no side effect, gauranteed increase upto 4 inches. YIPEEE!!!
Apr 19, 2006
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20 comments:
There are three stages of sex after marriage:
"Anywhere" stage:when ull do it anywhere-the kitchen table,the shower,on top of the washing machine during the spin cycle.
the second stage is "Bedroom" Stage:when ull only do it in the bedroom with the lights turned out.
and the third stage is
the "Hallway"stage,when you pass each other in the Hallway and say"screw you!"
And whats this got to do with the "amazing world of spam".. Wake up Rip?
Or u r suggesting that wives are like spams. Unwanted, deletable and blockable..
Does SHE know naughty boy.. If she does you will have to feel suppresed this weekend dear..
interesting!! this, along with some of his other comments in the marriage post is leading me to wonder whether rip has a bad marriage. how is that possible?? he is so balanced, rational, understanding!
dear kaushik,u missed the point.
yr reaction is exactly what i expected.
u dont need a reason or relevence to smile.u can smile anytime, there is no harm.When u smile with a reason,yr smile is bound to fade away as soon as the reason or the relevence is gone.
To u shuv..this has been another conditioning that smile needs a rason.
Just smile as it is boss!
there are a lot of people who smile without reason. they are all in ranchi..u know why rip?
shuv,hey man even U missed the point.
u dont need to be balanced ,rational or understanding for a happy marriage.U just need to be SENSITIVE.Remember the old definition of Love : the ability to be sensitive?
in all the others u remain an OBSERVER trying to MANAGE the situation,but when u r sensitive u r a PARTICIPANT in the whole process yrself.and then no managing is reqd.
Have u ever heard of a skillful lover?
shuv please do not confuse a pathologically neurotic patient with an average person who has just forgotten to celebrate life.
hi rip!it was nice reading your comments related to marriage and capital punishment.True ,marriage is not essential,but i would differ on the point that it was not NEEDED.in fact it came into being bcoz of the NEED.otherwise man was pretty happy being a nomad,raising cows and chasing women.The whole damn civilizations to our present day psychotic society has originated from a certain NEED.
Marriage was one of them.r u married?just a thought.i know its not important.
"my doctor insisted that i come to see you," the patient told the psychiatrist."goodness knows why - i am happily married,secure in my job,lots of friends,no worries..."
"hmmm,"said the psychiatrist,reaching for his notebook,"and how long have you been like this?"
Happiness is unbelievable.
It seems that man cannot be happy.Sigmund Freud,after forty years of research into the human mind - working with thousands of people came to the conclusion that happiness is a fiction.Man cannot be happy.At the most we can make things a little more comfortable,may be reduce unhappiness a little,thats all but happy?Man cannot be.
We were on spam and then we were on marriage and now we are on smile and happiness.. hmm.. never mind.. the comments atleast keep the wheel going..
They say marriages are made in heaven (by God) and they are broken on earth (by humans). There are 2 ways a married man (most of them) can wake up from bed
With your wife's arse turned towards you with her loose and low waist pyjamas exposing her slit
OR
With your kid in between with fingers in his/her mouth and your wife sleeping a blissful sleep looking beautiful in her motherhood. If you are luckier the kids wakes up and gives u smile, a kiss and a hug. Your wife still sleeping the blissful sleep.
I hope you were talking of smiles like these. And there are many more. When my parents smile looking at me and my daughter dancing to the radio tune. They must be reflecting back on the times when they did the same with me. Or when June's mashi smiles whenever I give her some extra money for playing the caring mother to my daughter.
It is the latter kind of start that keeps marriages going..
But again your comments lights up the day. It makes me feel good to think that there are people who still read things written by amateurs, writers who do not belong to the journalistic coterie, those who are fresh and without an agenda and dont have to report to an editor...
thanks Kaushik for taking the pain to reply.
r u someway related to the journalistic media?that would be interesting as i'll have way too much to learn from u.
as for changing the topics..its like making a glance to the passing beautiful girls once in a while,when something serious is going on in the classroom.just taking a break pal!
May b what uve said is absolutely practical,but does it HAVE to be like that?Why cant it be like Amitabh and Hema in Bhagwan?is it too difficult or we simply wont give it a try?
Shall we keep on acting busy for the rest of our lives only to discover finally that nothing has been achieved?
Why does it have to be that our emotional dependence on our wives disappear as soon as the child is born?and vice versa for the wife.
As if the child becomes an instrument by which u can go on giving pain to each other and feed your respective egos for the rest of your lives?Nah..something has gone wrong somewhere..
dear Loki it was really fascinating
reading your post in the 'as usual im right' attachment(baggage).It was absolutely refreshing to feel the positiveness you have generated.its rare.ive tried to put in a few things do read if u care.
im sorry the attachment is 'Mera Bharat Mahan'and not baggage as ive mentioned earlier.
rip -
A wife is a wife, a mother is also a wife, a daughter can be wife and sister is a wife. Motherhood doesnt stop somebody from being a loving wife. You know if you look at the cake and add some more toppings on it.
Point is I have seen happiness in my wife in her motherhood. But before we spent some brilliant time together. Midnight movie shows. But we do the fine balancing act instead of running away from the obvious reality. Its about a completeness.
But I dont think people without a kid will understand the true meaning of it. You will not unless you hold that new born babe in your hand. Fragile and looking for your care. Its a differenct bonding and your wife acquires a new meaning.
Replying was never a pain. As long as you have pen it will flow and so long you have a keyboard and the time it will type.
Aimless ambling is good if you have time. But its better when you enjoying your walk on a mountain. Some people have a way with words. I admire them. Its a positive power. And like all powers when used correctly it achieves tremendous results. But why look for results? Absolutely right. I fully agree with that point of view as well..
By this time you must have realised I am not part of the journalistic brigade But yeah but have a sense of the snobbery around them. But that is common to all trades whether it is advertising or for that matter software. I can understand and empathise.
The trick is stay above it all not get affected. Its good to posture and take a stance but the moment you dither you waver you stand looking like a fool. Thats been my father's message. So be careful before you posture he says..
I thank my company for giving me a worklife so that I can spend all this time (20 mins) to put my point of view.
R we still missing the point?? Or there needs to be some more clarity (for confusions sake)?
Art for art's sake.. Comment for comments sake.. But it does churn the mind. Very nice..
welcome surojit..we need your debating skills here
3 hours!!!!!!!!!!!u bloody romantic!! yeah rip is getting confused..the others here know us so they know whether we have happy lives or not..
Hey rip, whats wrong with u man?i thought"everyone is entitled to voice his opinion?' what say?
come on boy u dont seem like someone who would get senti over these small issues.
would you like to tell us, apart from Rip van Winkle what other fairy tales fascinate you?
maybe 'tales of kumbhokorno'..they seem to have something in common suro..and i believe rip has gone off to sleep..seems like it will be looong wait till he wakes up.
hi shuv,hi suro,.... i'm b..a.ck.
only this time i think i would like to come back as 'uncle Tom'. remember the slave uncle?since u hv fired Rip thats seems to be the only way to survive in your blog.u see Rip van Winkle is an old man,cant take sooo much tongue lashings dudes.uncle tom would be the right person - he will take the lashings and still fight for what he feels is right.ha!ha!
i've a whole bunch of fairy tales suro,i'll tell u one day.they r anyday much better than sigmund freud,dale carneggie,allan pease or any other cheap management and psychological tricks journals for that matter;which put u in the middle of nowhere in life.trust me pals DROP THEM!
hey shuv,look at the brighter side, u have a new uncle to play with now. tee hee
dear rip,after going thru'your recent posts one simple question has occured in my 'naive'mind.
WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM MAN?
MY personal observations are:
1.you are a pathological character who derives his life source from irritating other people.
2.you are way toooo intelligent to be living in our'naive' mother earth.Just LIVE IT and be a saviour.
3.You possess an immaculate capacity of writing endless irrelevent stuff.
4.you have a decent reading habit,u are pretty lonely and you
are thoroughly confused what to do with ALL the knowledge you have aquired for ages.
TRY the garbage can.u just might realise how handy it can be.
5. you have chronic constipation.
just one reminder: did you go to your shirnk last week dear?dont forget you are STILL under treatment.
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