"The child is grown,
The dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb."
- Roger Waters
For the past 2 years I have worked as an island. Office is a place I somehow survive for 8 (sometimes less) hours a day. I dont interact with anyone, shun attempts by people to strike up friendships, work only to meet targets and nothing beyond. For the last 2 years, I dont know the names of any of my colleagues who sit around my cubicle.
The last 2 years has also seen the biggest growth in my career.
I am totally confused.
Apr 24, 2006
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21 comments:
dont be!!! confused i mean. why do u need the guy in the next cubicle to be ur friend, when u have wonderful ones outside?
forget being friends, i am talking about being barely civil..talking of friends, got this wonderful sms on friendship:
"For a man his friends are like his balls. Very close, constantly at hand and always hanging around, doing nothing. But without them, he is simply not a complete man"
i have become the same- i guess i always was more or less this way. i don't talk to anyone during my one hour commute to and from work. except for smiling, wishing, and making sympathetic noises when they rant, i don't talk to any of my colleagues. i carry a book with me and have my lunch alone, reading the book. sometimes i go out and sit in the sun, reading my book.
and you know what? i like it. i've always liked my loneliness more than having superficial acquaintances.
the problem cacti is finding people u can connect with..and they seem to get more and more difficult to find the older one gets. i talk incessantly when i am with close friends..but as u said, that becomes a effort with superficial acquaintances.
an old joke. a young man was running frantically.he saw an old begger sitting on the wayside and asked 'how far is the oakland town?'
the begger thought for a while and said'the way u r going it is 9999 miles young man,but if u turn around it is just round the corner.'
we all need to take an U turn shuv.the way we r going contentment seems to be 9999 miles away!
Life consists of very small things.When you become interested in 'big' things...you miss life.
we are all 'trapped by success'.Success gives you a lots of things.it takes away only onething from you..your real self.
the feeling of "emptiness" will keep on arising as and when you progressively drift apart from your own being.your Ambition causes you to drift apart.
ALL ambition arises out of inferiority complex.An intelligent person,by his very intelligence,becomes noncompetitive.His intelligence can see the absudity of the whole situation.We are all different and unique human beings,nobody is lower nobody is higher.the whole effort to become higher is stupid.
EGO is all we go on accumulating through education,manners,civilization,culture,schools,colleges,universities.you go on accumulating it.it is YOUR effort,you hv made it so big that you hv completely forgotten your own real identity.
dear shuv,do you need credentials to make someone your friend?
"a man who can say hello to a stranger, can say hello to a flower,can also say hello to a tree,can sing a song to the birds..." - kahlil gibran.
we desparately need 'dropouts'in this mad institution called the 'corporate world'.they will be our only hope.
was that a praise?
dear cacti girl,all i can say is dont forget to talk... to yourself.
its kind of weird,but try saying 'Hello' to yourself once in a while and you'll hear a tiny voice replying...thats YOU.
well, not really.. shuv..it was just a view..but really can u become ambitionless and egoless?if u can..you wont believe.. a whole new world awaits you...
nehi beta vivek. i met you when i was already in that phase. but i hit it off with you irrespective of that. which proves that its nothing to do with my mental state, its about the type of people i have been meeting. over the last 3 yrs, you and prashant have been the only lasting friendships i have been able to forge.
dear shuv,i think there are two ways to deal with a situation.
1. facing it
2. ignoring it or refusing to accept it.
in the first case, you can destroy the situation,or you might get destroyed by the situation,
but in the second case...
you are DEFINITELY going to get destroyed by the situation.
when you were having difficulty in connecting with people,did you try to find the cause why??
...may be the 'people' have nothing to do with it.
after reading your answer,I'll give you a GOOD news.
maybe its because i am superior being??
you mean pointed ears and long teeth?like in x-men?
no dear, not bcoz u r a 'superior being' but bcoz u hv created such a stone wall and iron gates around you that its immpossible for any simple man to enter through your gate.
its nice to live in a castle....just dont get lost in it dear
lest all you'll have is "mai aur mere tanhai..."
aaaaaah!! NOW i get it!
dear shuv,remember i told u ,when u answer my question i'll give u a good news?its bcoz i was absolutely expecting this 'tone' in your answers.
here's the good news baby:
I AM LEAVING YOUR BLOG.yea!!!
pardon me pal,but what ive understood is that u are an absolutely 'closed' person.you dont welcome healthy discussions of any kind.A 'face' seems to be real important to you as you can manipulate your answers and expressions thinking of that person. dear friend, you cannot even imagine the conversations we share in the other blogs.i wish you knew the taste of it. Sometimes a 'faceless' entity can be the best of friends.Have u seen the film 'Mitr' by chance?
anyway i hope you'll be able to come out of your 'shell'sometimes.
pls.dont waste this oppurtunity to REALLY interact with new people,and trying to be understanding to new view points.u wont believe,people are simply having a ball!
All this time while i had been an intruder in yr blog,all i had been trying was to 'reach your HEART'.destroying all your efforts to manipulate me with your 'mind'was simply to look beyond your intelligence which covers you like a cocoon all the time.sorry if i hurt you bro.but that was the only way!
Your heart sees what your eyes cannot.
Regaining innocence is, going BEYOND intelligence and being a madman is falling below it.
an earnest request, dont waste your blog on your 'hanky panky'topics dear,i'm sure you didnt create the blog for this in the first place.its a great oppurtunity to discuss the actual things that relate to life bro. dont miss it.
'intelligence' is no more 'intelligence' when it becomes a barrier.
bye bro,stay happy with your safe,secured and a BORING blog.may be u can go on discussing'weather in blore' with Kaushik and maintain a 'stiff upper lip'.
thats what u deserve.
May be sometimes bro......CHEERS!!!
BOLO TARARARARA!!!!!!!!!Everyone is invited to my house tonite to the party!!!!!!!!!
RIP VAN WINKLE IS LEAVING YOUR BLOG.....Boo hoo hoo!!! I am sure you are not coping well with this earth shattering news Apu 'dear'. And at this devastating juncture of your life you do not even have enough hankies to wipe your tears with 'dear'!!! Don't let this trauma stop you from writing though 'dear'! After all there are still those of us who visit your blog daily to read your "hankipankies"! OOOPS...I forgot the 'dear'! Excusez moi!
i HATE having to miss the party, but miss me DEARS!!!!!
RIP sounds too serious. he has some problem in life (may be he is the problem).
APU - I see no problem ignoring the cubicles next to you as long as those are guys, but never ignore the cubicles with pretty girls, if not for yourself then at least for your friends.
don't u know how lonely all of us feel (say Vikas and me) when we are with you.
be a GOOD friend please.
2 years reminded me that my life also changed a lot in the past 2 yrs.
I left my wife and lost all inspiration to work hard in office. I used to work hard in office because I wanted to go back home late.
Now its so much less work, good career growth and everything is fun.
i NEVER have pretty girls in the next cubicle..BOOOOHOOOOHOOOO...
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