I am sure all of you know this theory that has been around since 1929 that proposes that anyone on earth can be connected to any other person on the planet through a chain of acquaintances that has no more than four intermediaries. So basically that means that I only need to trace 4 people connecting my servant Deep to Demi Moore and I will be able to meet her. This has been proved by mathematicians in 1950 using a lot of statistical mumbo jumbo and sociologists who have spouted how humbling and noble this concept is.
I believe its all hogwash, but thats not the point. The point is, do watch the movie by the same name. The plot of the movie (starring Donal Sutherland and Will Smith) was inspired by the real-life story of David Hampton, a con man who managed to convince a number of people in the 1980s that he was the son of actor Sidney Poitier. Its a fantastic movie (you need to follow the dialogs carefully though) and brings out the incredible differences between people living next to each other in big cities - the ultra-rich surrounded by the gutter poor, and how they cope (or 'uncope') with this dangerous situation.
Try it.
Apr 28, 2006
Apr 25, 2006
Nightmares
Delhi has suddenly started giving me nightmares. All of a sudden, a hydra headed monster of infrastructural problems have raised its ugly heads. There is no water and no power. Power cuts happen at times like 11 PM, 4 AM and sleep has become a struggle (coincidentally, i am reading King's Insomnia now). And after tossing around at night, you can imagine my mood when I come to work. Had a fight in office just yesterday, and I am sure this will be one of many more to come. I think I will have a heart to heart with my boss soon. Dont think I will be able to survive this for long.
Amidst all this, can you imagine what nightmare I had last night? Vinod Kambli has been recalled, and that too as an opener. There is a huge debate in the media, and a disgusted Sourav has announced his retirement. I mean seriously guys, isn't there a limit as to what extent this game dominates our minds?
Amidst all this, can you imagine what nightmare I had last night? Vinod Kambli has been recalled, and that too as an opener. There is a huge debate in the media, and a disgusted Sourav has announced his retirement. I mean seriously guys, isn't there a limit as to what extent this game dominates our minds?
Apr 24, 2006
Comfortably numb
"The child is grown,
The dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb."
- Roger Waters
For the past 2 years I have worked as an island. Office is a place I somehow survive for 8 (sometimes less) hours a day. I dont interact with anyone, shun attempts by people to strike up friendships, work only to meet targets and nothing beyond. For the last 2 years, I dont know the names of any of my colleagues who sit around my cubicle.
The last 2 years has also seen the biggest growth in my career.
I am totally confused.
The dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb."
- Roger Waters
For the past 2 years I have worked as an island. Office is a place I somehow survive for 8 (sometimes less) hours a day. I dont interact with anyone, shun attempts by people to strike up friendships, work only to meet targets and nothing beyond. For the last 2 years, I dont know the names of any of my colleagues who sit around my cubicle.
The last 2 years has also seen the biggest growth in my career.
I am totally confused.
Apr 21, 2006
Munich - a review
Watched Spielberg's Munich yesterday. It was a landmark event of my life as I have redefined my career path after watching the movie. Here's what I will do:
1) Become a CIA agent
2) Go undercover in the middle east - Operation Brown Mongoose (to kill Osama)
3) There will be 73 million dollars deposited in a numbered account in Banque Nationale de Suisse for operational expenses.
4) I will take out the money, come to India and invest in MF, blue chip equities and real estate.
5) I will return to Dubai (didnt I say middle east before) and stay undercover for a year
6) When the 73 becomes 125 million dollars I will return to India and cash in.
7) I will go back to Virginia and tell the CIA ops head that I was unsuccessful and return 81.76 million dollars (principal plus 12% interest).
8) I will come back to india and invest 41.24 million dollars in MF, blue chip equities and real estate.
9) I will buy a maruti swift and a pair of Police sunglasses.
10)I will then retire and concentrate full time on my blog.
If you see any snags guys please point them out to me. I am serious!
1) Become a CIA agent
2) Go undercover in the middle east - Operation Brown Mongoose (to kill Osama)
3) There will be 73 million dollars deposited in a numbered account in Banque Nationale de Suisse for operational expenses.
4) I will take out the money, come to India and invest in MF, blue chip equities and real estate.
5) I will return to Dubai (didnt I say middle east before) and stay undercover for a year
6) When the 73 becomes 125 million dollars I will return to India and cash in.
7) I will go back to Virginia and tell the CIA ops head that I was unsuccessful and return 81.76 million dollars (principal plus 12% interest).
8) I will come back to india and invest 41.24 million dollars in MF, blue chip equities and real estate.
9) I will buy a maruti swift and a pair of Police sunglasses.
10)I will then retire and concentrate full time on my blog.
If you see any snags guys please point them out to me. I am serious!
Apr 20, 2006
An amazing song
It seems like yesterday
But it was long ago
Janey was lovely, she was the queen of my nights
There in the darkness with the radio playlng low
And the secrets that we shared
The mountains that we moved
Caught like a wildfire out of control
Till there was nothing left to burn and nothing left to prove
And I remember what she said to me
How she swore that it never would end
I remember how she held me oh so tight
Wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then
Against the wind
We were runnin’ against the wind
We were young and strong, we were runnin’
Against the wind
And the years rolled slowly past
And I found myself alone
Surrounded bv stranners I thought were my friends
I found myself further and further from my home
And I guess I lost my way
There were oh so many roads
I was living to run and running to live
Never worried about paying or even how much I owed
Moving eight miles a minute for months at a time
Breaking all of the rules that would bend
I began to find myself searchin’
Searching for shelter again and again
Against the wind
A little something against the wind
I found myself seeking shelter against the wind
Well those drifters days are past me now
I’ve got so much more to think about
Deadlines and commitments
What to leave in, what to leave out
Against the wind
I’m still runnin’ against the wind
Well I’m older now and still
Against the wind
But it was long ago
Janey was lovely, she was the queen of my nights
There in the darkness with the radio playlng low
And the secrets that we shared
The mountains that we moved
Caught like a wildfire out of control
Till there was nothing left to burn and nothing left to prove
And I remember what she said to me
How she swore that it never would end
I remember how she held me oh so tight
Wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then
Against the wind
We were runnin’ against the wind
We were young and strong, we were runnin’
Against the wind
And the years rolled slowly past
And I found myself alone
Surrounded bv stranners I thought were my friends
I found myself further and further from my home
And I guess I lost my way
There were oh so many roads
I was living to run and running to live
Never worried about paying or even how much I owed
Moving eight miles a minute for months at a time
Breaking all of the rules that would bend
I began to find myself searchin’
Searching for shelter again and again
Against the wind
A little something against the wind
I found myself seeking shelter against the wind
Well those drifters days are past me now
I’ve got so much more to think about
Deadlines and commitments
What to leave in, what to leave out
Against the wind
I’m still runnin’ against the wind
Well I’m older now and still
Against the wind
Apr 19, 2006
The amazing world of spam
Nowadays I diligently go through my spam mails before deleting them. There is a world of entertainment hidden there. Here are the top 5:
1) Very common are the ones with the plight of a terminally ill child who is paid 12 cents by the service provider for every person you forward the mail to.
2) Congrutaltions! You have 2.75 million dollars jackpot in the Online Lotto draw! Just open an account with us with a minimum deposit and we will transfer the winnings to you.
3) This one i got today. Its great news! Some solicitor has traced my name as the sole beneficiary of an estate worth 5.3 million dollars belonging to a man who has died hierless and without a will. This diligent bugger has traced me based on my last name and is willing to file a claim for me in return of 40% of the amount.
4) Natasha is looking for you! Along with 2347789 beautiful females!! Only at bharatmatrimonials.com
5) But the winner is Penis Enlargement Pills. Herbal, no side effect, gauranteed increase upto 4 inches. YIPEEE!!!
1) Very common are the ones with the plight of a terminally ill child who is paid 12 cents by the service provider for every person you forward the mail to.
2) Congrutaltions! You have 2.75 million dollars jackpot in the Online Lotto draw! Just open an account with us with a minimum deposit and we will transfer the winnings to you.
3) This one i got today. Its great news! Some solicitor has traced my name as the sole beneficiary of an estate worth 5.3 million dollars belonging to a man who has died hierless and without a will. This diligent bugger has traced me based on my last name and is willing to file a claim for me in return of 40% of the amount.
4) Natasha is looking for you! Along with 2347789 beautiful females!! Only at bharatmatrimonials.com
5) But the winner is Penis Enlargement Pills. Herbal, no side effect, gauranteed increase upto 4 inches. YIPEEE!!!
A north indian wedding
Actually it was a pre-wedding cocktail party. Went there expecting a stag affair where everyone gets roaring drunk and a couple of fights break out. Turned out to be a family affair with plenty of women and children. What I loved was this punjabi culture of dancing. There was a strobe lit dance floor which was filled to capacity. For women whose husbands were too busy drinking, they were quite happy to take on 12 year old partners. And the best part came when the grooms parents came on the stage on popular demand. Uncle and aunty danced to 'Ae mere zohra zabin' and it was wonderful. I wish I had seen my parents dance to a romantic number. Will agree to marry once more just to see that.
Apr 13, 2006
As usual, I was right
Remember this post and Loky's optimism? I had given him 3 months before he changed his mind. It, in fact. took him 3 weeks. Here's what he said yesterday:
1) He is sick of Kannadis
2) He is sick of the infrastructure issues
3) He is sick of the inefficiency of the people around him
4) He wants to go to some onsite project soon.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! MERA BHARAT MAHAAN!!!
1) He is sick of Kannadis
2) He is sick of the infrastructure issues
3) He is sick of the inefficiency of the people around him
4) He wants to go to some onsite project soon.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! MERA BHARAT MAHAAN!!!
Rantings and ravings (censored)
Statutory warning: Explicit language. Skip reading if you are too cultured
Bangalore is shut down because Rajkumar died. People have burned vehicles, blocked roads and closed markets. The so called silicon city of India, hub of the new face of india, home to the most 'happening' population of India. Tum sab kannadio ki !!&&**%. When I was in blore, there was a 7 day riot because Rajnikaant had come and during a speech, someone from the crowd abused him. This started a riot between !!&&**% Kannadis and !!&&**% Tambis that shut down the city. What the !!&&**% is the problem with these rasam guzzling !!&&**%? And the media! If this had happened in Kolkata, the channels and papers would have been full of how bandhs have ruined Bengal. When it comes to Bangalore, its 'genuine and spontenous outpouring of grief'.
Sehwag said 'Ganguly is history'. !!&&**% doesnt remember those days when Ganguly voluntarily broke up the most successful opening partnership (between him and Sachin) so Sehwag can open. !!&&**% does not even have the performance platform from which people like Dravid can dare to speak from.
Salman's lawyer has said killing a black buck is equivalent to killing cows, pigs, goats, fishes and chicken for eating. I am sure he will get a lot of support from the !!&&**% cow belt and from that !!&&**% Maneka. In India, the concept of animal protection is ludricious. So we have wild elephants destroying crops and forcing people to starve and people multiplying more than rabbits and eating up all forests. Maneka pass a one family one child law first u !!&&**%.
US has sounded a warning to Brazil to control deforestation in Brazil. Those !!&&**% are the biggest consumers of power. Cities are lit up 24 !!&&**% hours a day, heaters are on 12 months a year, they have started screwing up the Antartic for oil exploration digs and they dare lecture others.
Vivek is taking his wife to Vaishnodevi. Saale ko bola upar pohuchke ek friendly push de dena, saala gussa ho gaya. Take decisions and become pro-active, else stop cribbing.
Buss.
Bangalore is shut down because Rajkumar died. People have burned vehicles, blocked roads and closed markets. The so called silicon city of India, hub of the new face of india, home to the most 'happening' population of India. Tum sab kannadio ki !!&&**%. When I was in blore, there was a 7 day riot because Rajnikaant had come and during a speech, someone from the crowd abused him. This started a riot between !!&&**% Kannadis and !!&&**% Tambis that shut down the city. What the !!&&**% is the problem with these rasam guzzling !!&&**%? And the media! If this had happened in Kolkata, the channels and papers would have been full of how bandhs have ruined Bengal. When it comes to Bangalore, its 'genuine and spontenous outpouring of grief'.
Sehwag said 'Ganguly is history'. !!&&**% doesnt remember those days when Ganguly voluntarily broke up the most successful opening partnership (between him and Sachin) so Sehwag can open. !!&&**% does not even have the performance platform from which people like Dravid can dare to speak from.
Salman's lawyer has said killing a black buck is equivalent to killing cows, pigs, goats, fishes and chicken for eating. I am sure he will get a lot of support from the !!&&**% cow belt and from that !!&&**% Maneka. In India, the concept of animal protection is ludricious. So we have wild elephants destroying crops and forcing people to starve and people multiplying more than rabbits and eating up all forests. Maneka pass a one family one child law first u !!&&**%.
US has sounded a warning to Brazil to control deforestation in Brazil. Those !!&&**% are the biggest consumers of power. Cities are lit up 24 !!&&**% hours a day, heaters are on 12 months a year, they have started screwing up the Antartic for oil exploration digs and they dare lecture others.
Vivek is taking his wife to Vaishnodevi. Saale ko bola upar pohuchke ek friendly push de dena, saala gussa ho gaya. Take decisions and become pro-active, else stop cribbing.
Buss.
Apr 11, 2006
Another firang rape?
Was sitting in a bar in CP last sunday. It was a typical 'theka' kind of place and was filled up by typical middle class regular drinkers. And in a corner there was this beautiful Japanese (i think) girl sitting alone with a bottle of beer. Everybody's eyes, minds and other things were focussed on this girl. Next to the girl there were 3 young guys who were trying to work up courage to start exploring options. As expected they could not come up with the guts, but unexpectedly it was the girl who struck up conversation with these guys. Things progressed from talking, toasting, offering cigarettes, offering beer, taking snaps, taking closer snaps, hand-accidently-brushing-tits moves, hands-casually-resting-on-thighs moves to requesting the girl to take turns with each of them for 'friendly' photographs. Everyone else in the bar was mentally cursing these guys for their incredible luck, rueing their own table selection fate and asking god what they had done in their past lives to deserve this. I was thinking whether I will be reading tomorrow's paper about another rape in a car. But then these arseholes screwed up. They got so excited that one of them made a call and in about 5 minutes in walked 3 of their friends. The ones that came in were total taporis, answering perfectly to the 'jeans jacket-love locket- comb in back pocket' category of delhiites. They all crowded at the same table and the ratio now read 6-1. Some warning bells went off in the girl's head and she excused herself, got up, paid the bill and beat it. Everyone cheered (mentally) and smiles and conversations started all around the bar. The 6 sat there scratching their heads and wondering what went wrong. What arseholes!!
Judiciary going overhead
Saw a banner in Chandni Chowk yesterday. It read:
'Haseena marti hai to sarkar hilti hai,
Gareeb vyapari marta hai to sarkar kyu soti hai?'
The reference was to the hype over the Jessica Laal case and the recent High Court decision to demolish all shops in residential areas in Delhi. The demolition issue has 3 aspects to it:
1) Why was permission given to construct shops in residental areas in the first place? Who will catch the MCD and court officials who had been bribed to allow this to happen in the first place?
2) The court has ruled that Chandni Chowk is a residential area. Its a bloody 200 year old market! From the very first city plan it had been designated as a commercial area. Now one judge's ruling has changed all that.
3) The traders have also said that they are willing to relocate if they are provided land elsewhere. Their point is when u demolish slums u relocate beggars and squatters, whereas we have paid for these establishments.
I agree with the traders here. The court has suddenly started taking on a totalitarian role. There have been other excesses by the court in the near past. I am no fan of Salman, but 5 years for killing a deer?? Isnt that a bit too much to swallow?
'Haseena marti hai to sarkar hilti hai,
Gareeb vyapari marta hai to sarkar kyu soti hai?'
The reference was to the hype over the Jessica Laal case and the recent High Court decision to demolish all shops in residential areas in Delhi. The demolition issue has 3 aspects to it:
1) Why was permission given to construct shops in residental areas in the first place? Who will catch the MCD and court officials who had been bribed to allow this to happen in the first place?
2) The court has ruled that Chandni Chowk is a residential area. Its a bloody 200 year old market! From the very first city plan it had been designated as a commercial area. Now one judge's ruling has changed all that.
3) The traders have also said that they are willing to relocate if they are provided land elsewhere. Their point is when u demolish slums u relocate beggars and squatters, whereas we have paid for these establishments.
I agree with the traders here. The court has suddenly started taking on a totalitarian role. There have been other excesses by the court in the near past. I am no fan of Salman, but 5 years for killing a deer?? Isnt that a bit too much to swallow?
Apr 7, 2006
World Test Playing 11
Toughest post till date..comments please.
- sunny
- greenidge
- lara
- richards
- sachin
- dujon
- roberts
- holding
- warne
- imran
- lilee
Apr 5, 2006
It happens only in America
True story (courtesy Suro)
A lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured them against fire among other things. Within a month having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars and without yet having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the lawyer filed a
claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the lawyer stated the
cigars were lost "in a series of small fires."
The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason: that the
man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The lawyer sued .. and won!
In delivering the ruling, the judge agreed with the insurance company that
the claim was frivolous. The Judge stated, nevertheless, that the lawyer
held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars
were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire,
without defining what is considered to be unacceptable fire, and was
obligated to pay the claim. Rather than endure lengthy and costly appeal
process, the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid $15,000 to the lawyer for his loss of the rare cigars lost in the "fires."
NOW FOR THE BEST PART...
After the lawyer cashed the check, the insurance company had him arrested on 24 counts of ARSON!!!!
With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being
used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his
insured property and was sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000
fine.
A lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured them against fire among other things. Within a month having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars and without yet having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the lawyer filed a
claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the lawyer stated the
cigars were lost "in a series of small fires."
The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason: that the
man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The lawyer sued .. and won!
In delivering the ruling, the judge agreed with the insurance company that
the claim was frivolous. The Judge stated, nevertheless, that the lawyer
held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars
were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire,
without defining what is considered to be unacceptable fire, and was
obligated to pay the claim. Rather than endure lengthy and costly appeal
process, the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid $15,000 to the lawyer for his loss of the rare cigars lost in the "fires."
NOW FOR THE BEST PART...
After the lawyer cashed the check, the insurance company had him arrested on 24 counts of ARSON!!!!
With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being
used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his
insured property and was sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000
fine.
Apr 3, 2006
Is this cricket?
Munia was disgusted with me for not being happy with India's victory today. My point that it was not good cricket, England being without 7 members of their ashes team, did not wash water with her. The truth is that I dont consider this to be an Indian team bcos this is not the best 11 we have. Adding to that Chappel's arrogance, More's blatant high-handedness and Dravid's shameless spinelessness....no, there's no support for this team from within me. I do like it when youngsters like Sreeshant or Raina come good..but support for the team? NO WAY! How do you guys feel?
Koi Mil Gaya
Watched it for the 23rd time last weekend when I went to Bombay. Although the last 22 times have been at Riju's request (demand?) I have enjoyed each and every viewing. And its not just because of the great acting (Hrithik was brilliant), or the marvelous cinematography or choreography or script. Its watching the movie with kids that does it for me every time. Its a movie that not only makes a kid have a rolloicking time but also makes him think things out. It feels great to give a high five to my son when hrithik smartens up and tells the computer teacher 'aadmi computer ko banaya, computer ne aadmi ko nehi banaya. kisiko chota dikhane se pehle yaad rakhenge sir ki har chota ekdin bada hota hai'. Or to applaud and cheer wildly along with all the kids when hrithik manages to come with a fantastic dance step after trying and failing thrice.
And about making a child think, here is last saturday's conversation with my son:
Self: Achcha ayush tell me..this jaadoo becomes weak when there is no sun, so why doesn't he store his power in the day time?
Ayush: Like you charge your mobile and use it?
Self: Yeah?
Ayush: The sun is like fire and the moon is like a sea. When you pour water on a fire what happens?
Self: It goes out.
Ayush: Same. All powers of Jadoo goes out when the moon comes out.
Amazing or not?
And about making a child think, here is last saturday's conversation with my son:
Self: Achcha ayush tell me..this jaadoo becomes weak when there is no sun, so why doesn't he store his power in the day time?
Ayush: Like you charge your mobile and use it?
Self: Yeah?
Ayush: The sun is like fire and the moon is like a sea. When you pour water on a fire what happens?
Self: It goes out.
Ayush: Same. All powers of Jadoo goes out when the moon comes out.
Amazing or not?
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